11 May 2025

When married couples show respect for each other’s feelings and needs, it builds trust and stability in their union, Maun Ministers Fraternal secretary, Professor Bernadette Malala has said.

Trust, she said, was crucial in marriage as it allowed partners to be vulnerable and honest with each other, fostering intimacy and closeness.

She made the remarks during a day’s workshop on Thursday, organised by Sehithwa Village Development Committee (VDC) in collaboration with Re-A-Nyalana programme, which encourages cohabiting couples to get married.

About 10 couples who had been staying together for years from Sehithwa catchment area and Maun were tying the knot on Friday through the programme.

They were as such drilled on their rights, issues of inheritance, wills and family affairs, a day prior to the marriage solemnisations.

Prof. malala said respecting each other’s boundaries, both emotional and physical, was crucial for maintaining a healthy and balanced marriage.

“As wives, you should not quarrel with your husbands in public or in front of your children because that makes them feel undermined and belittled. You should avoid holding grudges and starting conflicts in public at all costs because that could impact the marriage and potentially cause tension.

Instead, Prof. Malala said married couples should create open communication that will foster understanding and compromise,” she added.

Prof. Malala, who is also the former district commissioner, also stated that some wives may not realise that their actions were disrespectful until they were pointed out, noting that unresolved issues could lead to disrespect.

She also advised couples to appreciate and acknowledge each other’s efforts, saying failure to do so could make the other partner feel unvalued. 

She said they should love each other unconditionally and satisfy each other’s sexual needs because failure to do so may caurse feeling of rejection.

Re-A-Nyalana programme coordinator, Ms Annah Morwaagole pointed out that some women were abusive to their partners, saying that abusive people believed that they had the right to control and restrict their partners lives.

Respect in marriages, she said was the foundation, adding that women should show respect by honouring their husbands, valuing their opinion and appreciating their commitment to them as well as considering their needs and values.

Outlining the objectives of the workshop and the programme, Ms Morwaagole said it aimed to help couples formalise their relationships through legal marriages, ensuring that they were recognised and protected by the law.

She also stated that they had also realised that many couples stayed together and made life commitments to each other in the process, which bred disputes once one of them died.

“Through this initiative, you should understand that your marriage has become official,” she added.

Since inception, Re-A-Nyalana  initiative has benefitted over 14 000 couples across the country and ‘I am happy that we have reached Ngamiland region’.

Kgosi Leretetse Mogalakwe explained that marriage was the foundation of the family institution, which formed the basis of any society. 

He hailed the programme for establishing stable family units and providing a conducive environment for child development and promoting family harmony.

Marriage, either customary or civil, he said enhanced dignity and fostered mutual respect and support. Kgosi Mogalakwe also stated that when couples opted for customary marriage, automatically they were considered married in community of property unless an antenuptial contract was signed before a customary marriage.

That means all assets and debts will be shared equally between the spouses including any property acquired before marriage. 

Kgosi Mogalakwe said in case a spouse died, the first matrimonial home belonged to the children. 

He therefore encouraged new couples to build their new homes to avoid conflicts. ENDS